I’ve been feeling the urge to try and do some creative, artsy things lately. Being inspired by others is definitely something I didn’t expect to happen [because I’m generally uninspired, not because there isn’t an abundance of super inspirational people out there], but it’s what’s been the driving force of my creativity these days. Granted, almost all of this creativity is alleged, because it’s still in my head at the moment. I need a kick in the rear to motivate me to do just about anything.

I love Instagram mostly for one reason: I can control what I see. I only follow accounts that are going to inspire and uplift me, and I pass on everything else. I follow a lot of food-related accounts: chefs, restaurants, home bakers, and people who, like me, just like to eat food. Is being a patron of the culinary arts a thing? If so, I totally am. I also follow a lot of people who love what they do, and I’m so inspired by that. I want to love what I do and use it for the glory of God. I want to use my gifts in new, scary ways. (By the way, this is right now, sudden burst of creativity me speaking. In probably exactly ten minutes I will be utterly terrified by what I just typed out.) I want to create beautiful things and inspire others to do the same.

When I became a mom almost three years ago (!) I struggled with identity. I was so engrossed in breastfeeding and changing diapers and listening to every sound and watching every breath, that I literally could not remember who I was or what I liked to do. I would lay on the couch at night after baby girl was in bed and just stare. I wanted to do something, but nothing sounded enjoyable. Looking back, I think I probably had a bit of PPD going on, but at the time it was just how it was. I remember having a breakthrough moment where it just clicked that I needed to seek out who I was in Christ first, and that the rest would come later. That helped so much. Putting my focus back on God was how I eventually felt like myself again. Well, sort of myself. Bits of my old self came back and mixed with my new motherhood and made me into who I am today. Life is so weird. And beautiful.

When I was in high school and college, I made a lot of collages and did a lot of scrapbooking. I loved it. I know those activities probably date me, but I truly did enjoy it. To this day, the [small] graphic design element of my job is my favorite part. I always say I just “know what looks good and what doesn’t” Never having gone to school for any of that (French major over here…🙋‍♀️), I couldn’t even begin to explain even the basics of design. I know the rule of thirds, but that’s about it. That’s a thing, right?

Anyway, the other night, I just had the strongest urge to draw. I haven’t drawn anything in like, two decades probably. I don’t have a sketch pad, and it was like 10:30 PM and I didn’t want to go digging around in my desk for some paper. So I grabbed my bible journal with the intention of doodling in there, but I just wasn’t feeling it. [Side note: is anyone else out there like ridiculously picky about their journals? I love the cover of the one I have right now, but it isn’t spiral bound and it just makes me unreasonably angry to try to use it sometimes. I hate having to fight with it to make it stay open while I’m writing. Plus, there’s like this whole inch column down every other page that I just can’t quite get my pen in there to write… ugh. It’s a first world problem, for sure.] I remembered that you could draw on the note app on my phone and decided to give it a whirl. These particular words came to mind as soon as I sat down to doodle. It took me forever to get a version I like enough, and it’s still not perfect at all. My phone needs a stylus – finger writing on a screen just isn’t the same.

My husband and I need so many prayers of encouragement at the moment. I feel like God is moving in our hearts and leading us to something big and scary. If you all don’t know my husband a) you should, because he is the sweetest human being on the planet, and b) he is good at pretty much everything. Okay, not everything, but A LOT of things. He taught himself the bass, guitar (he plays this crazy good), piano, and drums. I always tease him that he can listen to a song once and instantly know how to play it on guitar (and that’s only exaggerating a little.) He is excellent at woodworking, plus he LOVES it. He was going to school for drafting and loved that. I’m telling you, anything he tries to do, he learns it quickly and well. Our pastor’s wife is in on this joke and commented on the pumpkin he painted a few weeks ago with perfectly straight free-handed triangles. I mean, seriously, he even paints pumpkins well. Anyway, there are so many things he is good at that I just know he knows how to do for a reason. I’m not speaking any specific idea out loud yet, because I don’t want to limit what God has in store for us. But, I’m almost certain we were meant to work together somehow, owning our own business. Prayers for boldness and discernment for that would be greatly appreciated.

Anyway, this whole tangent started because I said I was feeling creative. So, here’s me, putting that out into the world. I pray that I can continue to be inspired, and that it will lead to something amazing!